Room 307, Sunday Evening

[dollpocalypse]

There really was nothing like a game of laser tag to put Topher in a hacking mood, he decided as he flopped down on his bed, still laser-suited-up with his pack and his blaser on. (He'd picked this equipment out for comfort; in fact, he could probably sleep in it if he had to. Not that he could think of a situation in which he would have to.) With nothing else to do and no one to bother on IM, he thought about maybe poking around some secret files. You know, just for fun. 

The server he'd been investigating for his evil overlord Peter had kicked him out... so maybe it was time for another go.

Before long, he was back clicking through IF files. Ah, laser tag and hacking. Throw in some horrible island craziness that would upset everyone and it would be a perfect day.

[[Open for IMs and visitors! Exactly what files he's poking through is NFB, but the rest is for your broadcasting pleasure!]]

Comments

[hoorayimrich.livejournal.com]

In another room in the dorms, someone was also online. Though less clad in laser tag equipment. Though that was probably for the best as his would probably be a trimmed down version of his armor.

Yeah, no one could claim he played fair on games skewed toward the nerdy.

His computer gave a little chime at him, alerting to something odd in the network. Odd enough to get him to stop coding his latest project to take a look at it.

magnetsarescience: Who are you and just what do you think you're doing?

[dollpocalypse]

Apparently, a few days ago, when he had been watching Space Odyssey with the volume turned way up? Yeah, he hadn't quite managed to turn the volume down afterwards. The little ding that announced a new instant message was practically deafening.

And oh, look, it was a morally judgmental instant message. Just what he'd always wanted. He decided sarcasm was the best response.

brinkofgenius: Playing Chinese checkers. Why, wanna join?

[hoorayimrich.livejournal.com]

Somewhere, the music from a spaghetti western played as black hat faced off against white hat. In a way that was not at all like that horrible movie.

Tony frowned, sitting up properly as he typed back.

magnetsarescience: Oh, a troll. How lovely. I was getting bored for a moment there.

[dollpocalypse]

That horrible movie that they'd had to watch in Computers 101? Oh, totally on Topher's Top 10 list.

brinkofgenius: Oh, I didn't mean to bore you. May I reccomend a video game? Or maybe some kite-flying to pass the time?

[hoorayimrich.livejournal.com]

The only good part was Angelina Jolie. The only good part.

The other guy looked like James Van Der Beek. DNW.

magnetsarescience: You're so kind. Now run along, kid.

Because, you know, Tony clearly wasn't a kid. Really now.

[dollpocalypse]

Topher's response was somewhat lacking in maturity. Just somewhat.

brinkofgenius: Aw, please, Mom? Five more minutes!!!!!oneoneone11112four

[hoorayimrich.livejournal.com]

magnetsarescience: Bye bye, genius.

Tony smirked as he finished the last of the code to boot the kid from the school's server. It should keep him offline for the foreseeable future.

Unless he was really clever about getting back on.

[dollpocalypse]

And Topher was definitely really clever about getting back on. Sorry, Tony.

Within three minutes, Topher had managed to get back online and send a number of inappropriate pictures to the guy who had booted him in the first place. Pictures that he had covered his eyes while locating because, you know, ew.

Sorry, Tony. Have some brain bleach.

[hoorayimrich.livejournal.com]

OHGODHISPOOREYES.

Once he closed all those images, the only plausible response would be to send some wonderful music by Rebecca Black to constantly play on his new friend's computer. It wasn't a virus, but it was close enough to be annoying.

Silly white hat tendencies.

[dollpocalypse]

Now, sure, Topher could send a virus. But that would end this delightful conversation! So the first thing he did was turn up the music, because hey, he could always put on noise-cancelling headphones, but who knew if this mysterious stranger who happened to live just across the hall even had such a thing?

And then he sent Mr. Magnets Are Science a little program. A program that would install the Dusk online MMORPG. Have fun with that.

[hoorayimrich.livejournal.com]

Once his computer chimed the intrusion and installation onto it, Tony couldn't help but laugh. If that was how he wanted to play.

Tony removed it, making sure to clean up anything malicious that might have been included before getting started on a response. A few pop up ads might be annoying, but how about a few hundred at once?


magnetsarescience: I'm really more of a first person shooter fan, genius.

[dollpocalypse]

A FEW HUNDRED POP-UPS. THAT WAS SO ANNOYING.

Topher cursed loudly enough to be audible even over the delightful (if ear-shattering) music, then pulled up the Task Manager to close all of them at once. Okay. What was worse than a few hundred pop-ups? Aha!

Topher zapped back a little script, nothing major, that would put all the program names on Tony's computer in Swedish.

brinkofgenius: Oh egentligen?

[[Google-translated LIKE A BAWSE: "O rly?"]]

[hoorayimrich.livejournal.com]

That was completely uncalled for.

Tony frowned, pulling out his phone to change it back. At least this one was still in English. Then responded by altering the pop up ads to one particular website.

Then, for good measure, added something to shut down the genius' keyboard. Because someone here had a healthy sense of competition.

magnetsarescience: Desu desu desu desu?

[dollpocalypse]

Yeah, good try, Tony, but the problem with that strategy was that Topher had three different laptops. He placed the one he had already been using off to the side, then hooked it up to another one so that he could fix the keyboard from a different computer. Once it was fixed, he sent back something else. Something that would change all of his new friend's computer alert noises to this.

And then, for good measure, he did the worst thing of all: he sent Tony to TVTropes.

[hoorayimrich.livejournal.com]

...he was a bastard.

Once the computer alerted the first time, Tony had to fix that with extreme malice. And had to wonder about the kid's music choices. Because seriously.

Tony set up a few layers of firewalls just in case before sending a program hidden inside of a gif of pudding to record the keystrokes the other kid made.

magnetsarescience: Best you got?

[dollpocalypse]

Hey, Tony was the one who had started it with Friday! This was the next logical step in musical decay.

Topher triumphed over the firewalls fairly quickly and spent a solid minute watching the pudding before he retaliated.

brinkofgenius: Not even close.

Then, right in the IM box, he pasted the entire text of "My Immortal," and set his own computer to resend it every eight minutes for the next three days.

[hoorayimrich.livejournal.com]

The coding was unique enough that he would probably recognize it again if he saw it. Not that it helped him figure out who the other person was, of course.

But that would defeat the fun of it.

magnetsarescience: Scary.

Drawing up a few of his newer designs for dealing with Mr. Fix, Tony sent a bot to distract him with the usual questions of: 'Hi, my name is Amber and I'm in your town.' and 'I'm soooo hot for you. Won't you come see me?' while he went looking for whatever this genius kid was after concerning Ender.

Because porn spambots were always fun.

[dollpocalypse]

Except what Tony didn't know was that Topher was pretty much terrified of porn spambots. Or, you know, girls, for that matter. Once Porn Spambot Amber started getting to the pick-up lines, he shrieked at the top of his lungs and nearly spilled Mountain Dew all over his laptop.

But didn't. He wasn't that uncoordinated.

Once he recovered and figured out that the other guy was looking for what he'd been looking at, Topher quickly redirected him.

brinkofgenius: Thanks, but I'm not into girls with bad coding.

[hoorayimrich.livejournal.com]

What the hell was that noise? Never mind now, there was an internet to own!

Tony went right back toward the files as soon as he worked his way out of the website. If boy genius there was going to work to keep him out, he was really going to need to work for it.

magnetsarescience: Guys then?

The next spambots directed Topher to a gay porn website that, had Tony been more aware, Ben was in desperate need of at the moment.

[dollpocalypse]

EVEN WORSE! AAAAAAAGH.

There was another high-pitched shriek coming from Topher's room, along with the sound of an aluminum can toppling off a table and across a floor. Considering all the wires Topher had in his lair cave dorm, it was a miracle there wasn't an explosion.

He closed the terrifying website (whose images were now burned into his brain, thank you very much), put on a pair of headphones, and blasted an endless loop of FruitStories from his own computer as he tried to figure out how to keep this guy from seeing what he was doing. He'd found FruitStories to be particularly headache-inducing in the past. Hopefully, if this guy was at least in the dorm building, it would do its job.

[hoorayimrich.livejournal.com]

Did someone have a small dog in their room or something? Weird.

Only Tony Stark would win a hacking competition by using porn to distract his opponent it would seem. And only on Topher Brink would it actually work.

magnetsarescience: I can keep going!

The bots changed again, blaring promises of a 'good time' if only he would just come visit their website. Oh baby, oh baby. He was almost there. Just a little more time...

...that was less dirty than it sounded in connection to his distraction methods. Honest.

[dollpocalypse]

Aaaand there was more shrieking, more can-crashing, and a brief beeping noise when another spill inadvertently led to a small fire. Topher took care of it by means of one of his roommate's shirts and then, panting heavily, returned to the computer.

brinkofgenius: THIS MEANS WAR.

It took him a few seconds to type up the program and read through it to make sure it was as perfect as he knew how to make it. Then, once he was sure that no one could beat it (at least, without being way smarter than him, and he totally didn't believe such people existed), he sent Tony a code to create the Blue Screen of Death.

brinkofgenius: Say goodnight, Amber.

[hoorayimrich.livejournal.com]

Oh, he did not try to shut down Tony's systems. He did not.

Tony made an annoyed noise, fingers flying over the keyboard to correct each system before it could crash completely. He would have to save this once he was finished in order to... find a way to keep it from even getting a foothold in his systems. And maybe alter it as a back up in case of attacks.

Shhhh.

It took longer than he'd ever like to admit in order to get everything back up to optimal levels.

Then stretched his hands over his head before firing a worm right on back to gobble up anything worth note in boy genius' computer.

magnetsarescience: Oh, baby. Oh, baby. I'm so impressed by the size of your virus.

[dollpocalypse]

Fortunately, certain mistakes Topher had had in the past kept him from ever using his laptop with the important stuff on it unless he needed to actually use said important stuff. All the worm managed to get was an outdated version of Mario Kart and a couple of Omegle chat logs.

brinkofgenius: EW! Quit it with that!

...The dirty talk was still terrifying. He followed it up with a GIF of an obscene parrot meant to mask the new screensaver he set for Tony's computer: a video of a dog pooping on a baby. Classy as ever, Topher.

[hoorayimrich.livejournal.com]

magnetsarescience: Really?

Tony was going to use this for evil, you know. It was necessary for the good of mankind.

magnetsarescience: Not a fan?

With that response, he added a pop up of a scantily clad woman blowing kisses. That would show back up each time it was closed.

[dollpocalypse]

BUT -- BUT -- BUT -- WHERE WERE HER CLOTHES, TONY? THEY WERE GONE. INAPPROPRIATE.

This computer was going to need so much repair work after this war was over. In the meantime, he logged on as a guest to avoid the awful pop-ups. Rather than retaliating with something equally obnoxious, he had to ask a question.

brinkofgenius: Dude, I have to ask. Who ARE you? Did Peter put you up to this?

[hoorayimrich.livejournal.com]

Peter? DEAR GOD, TONY. USE THAT GIANT BRAIN OF YOURS.

magnetsarescience: Is that why you were looking into information on Wiggin?

Someone was in Iron Man mode, it would seem.

[dollpocalypse]

...Oops.

brinkofgenius: Uh, I was playing Chinese checkers, so...

That should fix the situation.

[hoorayimrich.livejournal.com]

He was Batman.

magnetsarescience: And to answer your other question: Someone who has been doing this for almost a decade.

Because someone grew up in the lab with only nerds to supervise him. God help the world.

With that, Tony disconnected. He'd have to go find whatever it was about Ender that was so interesting when he was in his lab with all the nice defenses in place. And not just a laptop.